Monday, October 8, 2012

Glass Breaks, Lesson Learned

I can't remember what the weather was like outside. I can't remember what the house even looked like from the street corner. I can't even tell you which house we were in... What I can tell you is that while visiting in Michigan at around 12 years old I was putting the clean dishes into the cabinet and I broke something. It was fragile, obviously really old, and beautiful. I was so upset. I was also scared I was going to get into major trouble! This thing had to be important. Turns out, it was. However, to my surprise my mom walked in and although obviously disappointed, didn't seem to be angry at me. I found out that I had broken a piece of her grandmothers wedding china. I could have cried for days! I understood the significance because back in Georgia I was raised in a household where the china stayed in the cabinet and wasn't even used for special occasions. It was to look at, not use. That's pretty normal from what I gather. Here, however, it was used daily. Mom said to me something along the lines of, "Well, it's bound to happen. I could keep it put up but what's the use in looking at it? I'd rather use it and enjoy it like it was meant to be." That was that. I learned a valuable lesson that day. I have actually already had similar situations happen with both of my children and when they were scared about getting in trouble, I shared this story.

broken tea cup

Right on cue, Mom sent me a note from MariaMontessori.com. The article is titled "If At First You Don't Succeed, GREAT!!!" You can read it here. Doesn't it make sense to allow a child to learn just the way every other human learns... naturally?

How else is Aiden Gray going to learn to carry his juice carefully so it doesn't spill if he doesn't learn that, duh, juice spills. So what if there's a mess to clean up... over and over and over and over again. Eventually it stops. Who knows, he may get so good at balancing his cup that he develops an impressive skill! For instance, I remember carrying piping hot coffee from the kitchen all the way to the shop for my Poppa... I only spilled it once or twice and got burned before I started being very careful. As a matter of fact, I got so good at carefully carrying hot coffee, that I could run the 50 yards and not spill a drop. Honest!

So get this, I searched the net for the above picture of the broken teacup and wandered upon an amazing blogger. Her name is Audra Silva, obviously, and she has a button up on her blog that I took particular interest in. Something I'm working on personally as a matter of fact.


I read her series and I'm sharing her button she made for it. It's a worthy read if you have children and find, too, that sometimes my reaction to frustration is controlled by my temper and not my mind. I strive to be an amazing mother but I know sometimes I feel like I just can't take anymore. Moments like these every sound or  "MOOOOM!?" call irritates me to no end. Personally, I have found letting go of trying to control their every move to keep them from making mistakes keeps me much calmer when they do make mistakes.

So on that note, I have something else to share! Mom sent me this book called "Free Range Kids". Then she sent it to me again. If you want it, I'll send you the second copy. First person to send me a note gets it: chickadette@gmail.com. You can read it about it by clicking the following photo:

2 comments:

  1. I've said it before and I'll say it again. If Van and I ever decide to have children, or have them regardless of what we decide, I hope to be a mom like you. :)

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  2. Thank you for your sweet comments. I love your story! Sometimes I manage to handle broken things with grace, and other times - it's sad. But you are so right. It really is about their learning along the way...if they don't make some mistakes, they won't learn. Welcome to the journey of learning to not parent angry. :)

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Peace,
Ashley Marie

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